Saturday, December 26, 2009

The Sides Stories of A.Marcellus #9

Irrational Fears

For the sake of upchucking my insanity somewhere, I am going to write of list down of all my irrational fears with plague my mind throughout my average day.

Alexis' Worries:
  • That the web cam is streaming and everyone can see her.
  • That the world she lives in is nothing more than a simulation.
  • Having depression, anxiety, avoidant personality, narcissistic personality, split personalities, schizotypal personality and/or an aneurysm.
  • Dying alone.
  • Being mugged.
  • House fires.
  • Robbery.
  • Getting arrested.
  • Being convicted.
  • Jail/gaol/prison.
  • Being bankrupted.
  • Being homeless.
  • Being in a crappy relationship.
  • Never being in a relationship.
  • Whether or not people are scheming behind my back.
  • Swallowing a poisonous insect in my sleep.
  • Choking on (and subsequently dying from) swallowing an insect in my sleep.
  • Swallowing ANYTHING in my sleep.
  • Looking like an idiot infront of someone I'm interested in.
  • Looking like an idiot infront of their friends.
  • Socialising.
  • Being hacked.
  • Having my finances stolen.
  • Being stalked.
  • Dying on the toilet.
  • Dying naked.
  • Being outside in my house clothes.
  • Being outside in NO clothes.
  • Being pregnant through odd means.
  • Dying a virgin.
  • Being killed in bed.
  • Breaking my own stuff.
  • Vomiting.
  • My tv falling and destroying my computer.
  • My life being a reality/soap opera show. (See The Truman Show)
Yeah, I stress about alot of things.

Friday, December 11, 2009

The Side Stories of A.Marcellus #8

Impending Insanity

Well, I'm officially on holidays and I suppose it's a joy that it started two weeks earlier than last year. For most people, this is a great time to just go out places, see the world and enjoy the company of friends and family. But, lets be honest here people, I'm not "most people". I'm more like "one person". So, my main point is, I've become a hermit.

It happens every holiday break I get. I just sit around inside my house, sleeping, eating, showering and surfing the web. Oh, yeah and going insane. I think I might be developing some bizarre sort of cabin fever or agoraphobia. It's only been one week and I have found myself sitting in an empty room trying to dig into the meaning of existence. For a few days just sat around the house thinking, "What if our world is just a simulation of the existence of another world?" In short, what if we were 'The Sims' of an even greater world. Our existence would be nothing more than the 0's and 1's of a program.

I went outside yesterday to collect some documents. I went out, collected my papers, greeted some friends than hurried home because the sunlight made my retina feel funny. I'm starting to dislike sunlight more and more. Also, I'm pretty sure I was acting weirdly yesterday. Colder, distant perhaps? It's all my impending insanity. Eventually, I may see my world matrix style with occasional 0's and 1's on random objects. Or every green or slow-motion.

Tah-tah,
Miss A.Marcellus

P.S: If you need me, I'll be at home for quite a while.